I'm not sure how coherent or creative this post will actually be considering the head trauma I went through within the past few days, but I'll make it work the best I can. This is something that I need to get out in the process of getting better, but it is still frightening to me.
Here's what happened:
All last week I was feeling sick. As in absolutely no energy, every joint in my body ached, I had chills, and had a low grade fever. I figured it was only, you know, a summer cold or small sickness that would go away with proper hydration and rest. I'm thinking that I was wrong...
Saturday morning I was up and out of bed by 5:30 am. I hadn't slept well at all that night and I felt sick still. All I wanted to do was take a shower in the hope that being clean would make me feel better. At that point my head was killing me, and I should have known that the headache was worse than it had been. Yet, I just pushed it aside as just being another symptom of being sick and took my hot shower, which turned out to be a bit too hot for someone with a fever.
I got out and felt like I was seriously going to throw up. It was at the point where you just know its coming and there isn't anything you can do to stop it so you just accept it and brace for the worst. I managed to get dressed before standing at the sink and "seeing stars". Seriously. It isn't an exaggeration or only something that happens in cartoons apparently.
The next thing I knew my parents were waking me up and asking me if I knew where I was. I was mildly confused because it felt like they were waking me up from bed, but then I realized that I was on the bathroom floor and the back of my head was in pain. My mom explained to me that I fell and hit my head so I needed to stay still to wait for the ambulance. After hearing that I was surprisingly calm. Even throughout the rest of the time at the hospital I wasn't freaking out. I still find that odd, but I guess it would have been worse if I was scared.
Anyway, since I don't feel like getting into all those hospital details right now, the end result of all that was eleven staples to the back of my head and a bruised brain.
And it doesn't end there. Two days later I was getting ready to go out and get some fresh air when I passed out again. Luckily this time my Mom was standing there to catch me and gently put me on the ground so I didn't hurt myself again. This time when they woke me up from the bathroom floor I was scared and far from calm. I didn't need an ambulance this time, but I did have to go back to the hospital and spend the night for observation.
I'm just going to give the general details because my head is still kind of sore and I don't want to give all the details because they still scare me too. I felt the need to write it out though in the process to get back to normalcy. The reason behind why I fainted this time was because I was low on protein and apparently get low blood pressure when I go to stand up for a long period of time. All the while run down from a minor sickness that was running through my system.
Right now my headache of four days is finally gone. My energy is starting to come back as I'm able to get food into my system even with a lack of appetite. I don't leave the couch without a pile of pillows either. I'm okay when I stand up, it's just that my eyes and head are still...off but that's a result of my bruised brain. And my staples are sore if I sit back on them by accident, and my ears ring occasionally. I also get random bursts of laughter, but that's not really that unusual for me. The main problem is the paranoia of fainting again because it's terrifying not having control over my body and not being able to stop it.
I hope that I can get back to normal again soon. It would be nice to be able to get back to being able to enjoy my summer instead of being stuck on the couch the whole time. I just have to keep thinking positive thoughts and I'll get there.
